» On 7/01/2014 01:55:00 PM Mountain Standard Time, Alan wrote:
Old Joke. 

Three elderly men are comparing notes about who has the worst health problems.

The seventy year old says, “Every morning I get up at 6:30 to urinate, but I have to stand at the toilet for an hour because my pee barely trickles out.”

“Heck, that’s nothing,” says the eighty year old, “I get up every morning at 7:30 to take a crap, but I have to sit on the can for hours because of my constipation. It’s terrible.”

The ninety year old says, “You guys think you have problems! Every morning at 6:30, I whiz like a racehorse and at 7:30, I crap like a pig.”

The eighty year old looks at the seventy year old, then looks back at the ninety year old incredulously and asks, “So what’s your problem?”

The ninety year old replies, “I don’t wake up 'til eight.”